Today I was talking to my friend about this girl he use to hook up with, who he really liked but never dated. He was telling me how he missed her and wanted to be with her. To which I responded he needed to forget about the dumb bitch because all she ever did was cock block him, and didn’t even put out. Which got me thinking about my ex girlfriend. We dated for a while and then got back together. We didn’t contact each other for about a year then out of nowhere she started talking to me again. I found this really strange, but decided I was okay with talking to her, and that I would attempt to at least stay friends with her because we had broken up so long ago. Long story short we kind of got back together and I ended up breaking it off with her like I did all the other times.
But tonight things were different. My friend got me thinking, about my ex. How much I loved her and how great we were together. Which I guess I am still thinking about right now.
To a certain extent, I miss her. But even if she some how came over to my house and begged me to take her back, i wouldn’t. I couldn’t. We broke up for a reason and by the looks of it that is never going to change. She had her moments, where she was just perfect. She was so comforting, it felt like she was the only one who really understood me. I guess in some ways she was, because she was the only person who I ever shared some of the thoughts that were going on in my head. But now after everything I kind of feel like an idiot for doing that.
I don’t know, I’m tired, I can’t sleep. I have school today and I am going to be so fucked.